7. "I SOUGHT THE PRAISE OF SINNERS"
(Words Uncle Davey, Voronezh, Russia, 12th October 1985. Music Chretien d'Urhan (1790-1845) Tune name "Rutherford".
The tune is named for Samuel Rutherford, and is normally sung to Anne
Cousin's hymn The sands of time are sinking,
which when unabridged is one of the longest hymns in use, as well as some of the best religious
poetry in the English language. My text cannot compare in beauty with the usual use of the tune
I have selected for it, but the state of mind in it is something which I, and I am sure not only I,
have needed to face up to again and again. Pride is a very sneaky sin, you can even feel pride
for believing you've dealt with your pride. I don't think I've managed to perfectly rid myself
of wrongful pride for more than a few seconds of my entire waking life, if that, which is why I
cannot but hope on the mercy of God, and why I say that those Christians who believe we can only
endure to the end and be saved if we become somehow free of sin, which when I compare that to my
own experience seems frankly laughable, and reject the doctrine of eternal security of believers
withiout attaining to some perfection on earth either don't have the same problems as I do or
they just gloss over them.
Needless to say, the second is more likely. I hope someone out there is blessed by these words as they resonate with your own experience.
First published 4th May 2004, Go back to list of hymns, Go back to home page or Go to Bulletin Board
(NB. The picture to the right was taken in 1985, this is how I looked when I wrote this hymn.)
1.
I sought the praise of sinners,
Their glance and their regard
I sought their admiration
And now my heart is hard
Lord, make me poor in spirit
That I might humble be
Cut back my vain delusions
Be all in all to me.
2.
My soul is sick and suffering
From self-idolatry
Lord, now I pray Thee, cleanse me
From sinful pride me free
O set me free from bondage
From seeking praise of men
And may I seek Thy glory
Not vaunt myself again.
3.
This hypocrite repentant
Lord, purge in sovereign grace
And may my spirit's leaven
Dissolve before Thy face
Lord, grant me self-abasement
And singleness of mind
To worship Thee for only
In Thee my all I find.
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